A Poem by michaelgallatin


Author: michaelgallatin
Created: May 19, 2017 at 10:52 am
Upload Type: Poem, G (All)  
Category: Animals | Weird | Humor
Upload Stats: 4.66 Stars by 3 users with 4 comments and 70 views

Rodents  

I'm like a hamster on a wheel.
Someone please tell me how to feel.
And what my friends is the damned deal?
What is real folk, what is real?

I'm like a mouse stuck in a maze.
Still wandering blindly in my daily daze.
Is this the maddest, latest craze?
Moving on slowly now through the haze.

I'm like a gerbil with a cage.
Though I might find it all the rage.
I feel like I am center stage.
As life just plays me page by page.

All these rodents seem like me.
Living onward and yet trapped you see.
Yet I may somehow find a bit of glee.
If that giant hand would let me be!

Michael "Guinea Pig" Gallatin


Last Modified: May 19, 2017 at 10:55 am
© michaelgallatin - all rights reserved

Author Notes


Thought of the idea last night. Wrote it just now. A comment upon how at times we are prisoners of our lives.


 
The author would love to hear your feedback but you must be logged in to do that. If you are a member of Writers-Network click here to login and review this writing entry.

Not a member? Not a problem! You can register here, it's free for everyone

Comments & Reviews ( X 3)



JimSlaughter
May 23, 2017
Helpful? Thumbs UpThumbs Down
So easy, sometimes, Michael, to get those hamster-like ideas. Like we're constantly moving...yet getting nowhere. Too many folks never see that in themselves. A very self-reflective piece. (I sort of wish, though, that you had used animal examples from a little higher up on the chain.)


There are no comments on this review.




feelnpoetic
May 21, 2017
Helpful? Thumbs UpThumbs Down
Nice interpretation
Great topic cool metaphors and nice timing keep on writing man
Outstanding job!
JB


There are no comments on this review.




caitlinjochitko
May 20, 2017
Helpful? Thumbs UpThumbs Down
I feel you there especially lately mother provider of four the days definitely can become dull and seem to go round like I'm just on a hamster wheel


There are no comments on this review.




SketerMichaels
May 20, 2017
Helpful? Thumbs UpThumbs Down
As Billy Corgan
of the Smashing Pumpkins sang, "Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in the a cage" This one rolls off pretty well and replicates the same thought in each stanza. In the context of the poem the replication of the rhyme on each line in the stanza makes perfect sense as well. In my opinion you went in the right direction with this idea, and didn't try to make what could have been a much darker piece with the idea. I would be just as concerned with the "giant hand" picking you up and feeding you to the snake in the cage across the room.
applaudapplaudapplaud


There are no comments on this review.




write Submit New Writing


Welcome Writers!
Sponsored Writing Ad
Today is November 23, 2017 and there are 13 writers online.



Featured Writers

avatar
TempestOfNature
1076 Writing Uploads
avatar
bianca
42 Writing Uploads
avatar
support
25 Writing Uploads
avatar
MaryJane
183 Writing Uploads

Upgrade to PRO



Top Reviewers

  1. KenWasky
  2. Abra
  4. richom


From Our Sponsors