A Poem by TheTinGirl
August 21, 2009 at 10:22 am
Poem, G (All)
Horror | Personal | Dark
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Softly the whispers of failure trickle, like blood from my ears.
Paranoid eyes glance here, then there...can anyone see?
Can you see my suffering, my internal demons
Begging me to throw the fight away and lay in an unconscious stupor.
My body is frightened, shaking constantly like the vibration of a drill,
Being born into my head, spinning and whirring- trying to break free.
I have no one to grasp onto, thus I hug myself and rock softly.
I pretend it was him.. the one that got away...slipped through my fingers.
Can I just live in this world my imagination has created for me?
It's so kind, so soft... feels more right, even hopeful?
But what is the true value of the mind? Do I have to feel you?
No- I can pretend you're there by inhaling your cologne.
I can arrange the pillows and blankets just right while playing a heartbeat track.
It hurts at first... but as the sleeping pills take hold, I give a sigh.
My apartment is empty...I don't live there, but the bed is beginning to dent.
I wrap it up in pink and purple sheets, hoping the bright colors will excite me.
But they remain dull... black, white and red are all that is recognized.
I am a damaged film, unable to produce happy memories,
And crying acidic tears on the one I can't forget, no matter how hard I try.
I want to remove myself from this... but I can't find the strength.
Do I wait until a hand is seen, outstretched to pull me from my tomb?
It feels impossible... Because I cannot let them in. Damage control.
My mind stops and I sigh. This is where I belong, between life and death.
Forever walking along my nightmare's parks of empty swings and rusted jungle gyms.
Stuck here within my self. I cry...is there no help for me?
No outstretched hand?
© TheTinGirl - all rights reserved
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